Have you been anxious too?
I must ask you to sorry because this is my first text in English. And I wrote alone, well, not “alone”, because I’m using Microsoft Corrector and Grammarly. I’m learning the language yet, and this is my first try to publish and write in another idiom.
First, the article has another name, I was using “How are you doing?”, like Joey Tribbiani, but I this theme came out when I writing, so, talk about anxious is better.
Well, another question has a lot of variations, if we look in my context. I live in Brazil where the people don’t respect the law about isolation and so soon, we came to be a new epicentre from the pandemic and I’m not okay with this. So, the people we asking us: how are we doing with this?
The clear answer is: we are not doing.
I was thinking these days, the Brazil population are divided into three types of persons:
- The group who respect the rules of social isolation and understand we are living into the pandemic world and of us convert to anxious people because of the second group.
- The group who came out because “are missing get outsider and the see friends”. The group where they can respect the isolation, but don’t want to, because or don’t believe in the news or because they have a construction different from the world.
- The most important group and who we need to be so grateful is our front-group: medicine peoples, pharmacy, and supermarket attendant.
But I can’t speak about these people because I have the privilege’s to be at home these days. I’m in my second year in masters, I’m doing my draft of my research at home and I’m so grateful this. I don’t put other people in risk, and think I’m doing my part to helping no propagate this [shit of] virus.
Alright, I know, this is my obligation like part of society, but you need to see: the second group don’t respect the isolation because they won’t, so here, in Brazil, people are playing its role, is a hero. Believe me.
Youngers and instructed peoples are coming out to see with other persons. YOUNGERS. Remember. So, from time to time we need to question ourselves:
“HOW ARE WE DOING?”
“we need to compensate this free time”, the society said.
In the being, I confess, I was freaking out because I had to change all my plans to 2020: trips, academics plans, everything. And, to compensate these, I started to do a lot of things: free class online, reading a more of one of the book in the same time, have a compulsory impose to buy a lot of things in Amazon and I’m not using these things now, but I’m okay with this because are mine now and I can use this shopping’s later. [Okay, I confess, this is the way I find to think about the theme because I bought a lot of books, magazines and a wireless keyboard and mouse (???).]
But I’m not here to talk about my shop stuff. I want and we need to talk about how society makes us think: “we need to compensate for this free time”. Later, like after my first month closed in my home and, of course, a lot of therapy I comprise: everyone is fluting now, so, I’m started doing the whole thing more slowing. I don’t have to prove myself to anybody, so, bitch, please, do want you to want to do, just it.
Breathe,
if you need.
Watch all TV Show,
what you want,
and most important:
rest.
We are into the pandemic.
Society makes us think about we need to balance the time we don’t pass in the bus or closed in the traffic of cars. But this is not true. We are fighting against a world pandemic; we don’t need to compensate our time just because we don’t are using that in bus, car, or gym. I think you can compensate yourself because all the time you lose in these places.
Call to someone, cook something you like, with calm, observe the time, sleep after 00:00 am someday, look the stars, I don’t how, but try. You can recover your hobbies again. Like to draw for example. I lose these habits when I came to university and now, I passed long hours watching videos, learning about that and I forgot how I loved to do this.
I have all sense I’m privilege guy,
because I can stay at home, but if you can but having not doing that, please, remember, all these things are important to our and your family.
My mon can’t stay at home and I’m sad about that she’s going out someday of the week to work, and every day I think: “I can’t help her because she needs your job, but if I can stay home, I’ll do that because these can help my mon too.” Okay. This thought can be so selfish, but I don’t care, because I’m doing my part and helping more people than just my mom.
And, talking about anxious, I’ll to say for you: to solve the problem, I started the to-do list. Lists help me to see where I am in middle all the shit, help me to organize my day, help me feel I’m doing something, and not just vegetation.
This can contradictory but is not. I’m speaking to you: do list to feel better, I’m telling you my story. When, in the first month, I started to do everything in my front, I passed feeling overwhelmed feeling and this makes me feel anxious because I started to understand that I was not able to embrace the world at that moment. So, after some weeks, I started to slow down. Make lists of a few tasks that I really should do, like calling someone, reading a text for my research, among other things.
And the list helps me in this. My anxious came down, I started feeling better about my “all work I have to do”. I started to do just the necessary, and later after my organization, I begin to do more things, like teaching Spanish and Portuguese.
We are taught to charge ourselves too much. I, at least, feel it. And I think that society was able to convert the time we spent in traffic into an obligation to improve for companies, as if that time had to be used in improving the market and not it is own.
This is my recommendation: try to be more selfish, try to do things you want first and later, and then you can start thinking about doing more things. We are into a pandemic, so, it’s a different situation we are lived, so, please, breathe.
